CM Punk came to Friday Night SmackDown this week, and WWE didn’t make us wait long to see him. He opened the show, to a hero’s welcome from the folks in his hometown of Chicago. But what was he here for?
Naturally, he was there to run down Drew McIntyre, gloating over the fact that he made the promise to bury his career and I’ll be damned if he didn’t do just that. He just didn’t think it would be so easy.
The man quit!
But before he could go any further, or make any announcement about being cleared like he teased he might, he was interrupted by an old friend of his.
None other than Paul Heyman.
He gave Punk a hug, something he claimed he badly needed, before launching into why he was there — Solo Sikoa heard Chicago is CM Punk’s town and now that he’s the Head of the Table, he wants every town to be his own. He was pissed.
So Heyman was there simply to warn him.
Leave now or they’re going to come for you.
An incredulous Punk stood in disbelief. The Bloodline soon made their entrance to make the threat themselves, only for Punk to call them a couple of phony ass Usos and a cosplaying Tribal Chief. It’s worth pointing out that during all this, Punk asked Heyman what favor he wanted and he said “take me with you.”
Before this could all break down into blows, WWE Champion Cody Rhodes hit the scene with a couple of baseball bats to even things up. It led to Rhodes challenging Sikoa to a singles match later in the night.
Meaning Punk is not, in fact, cleared to wrestle just yet. And he didn’t have any indication for when he would be. I guess we’ll just have to stay tuned.
Meanwhile, Randy Orton and Kevin Owens ran into Rhodes backstage and were hesitant to endorse his idea of taking Sikoa on all by himself. Cody made like he has a plan.
Sikoa, for his part, was livid with Heyman for saying he wants to leave before ordering him to tell Tama Tonga and Tonga Loa to keep Orton and Owens far away from the main event match. He demanded a one-on-one conversation after.
Later still, we ended up going back to Punk, because he was manhandled through a door we didn’t see by none other than the man who quit the company just days ago, McIntyre. Drew proceeded to carry Punk’s lifeless body on his shoulders from the parking lot all the way through to the stage so he could drop him down in front of everyone, the camera showing his face to be a bloody mess.
General Manager Nick Aldis hit the scene and pushed him, leading to McIntyre, right there on camera, telling him “don’t put your fucking hands on me, I’ll kill you.” Or something to that effect.
They did a stretcher job for Punk, who sold the absolute hell out of all of this, and it ended up being one hell of an angle that made McIntyre look every bit like an unhinged badass without actually having to show Punk getting beaten up.
Really well done all around.
We still had a main event to get to, of course, and Heyman told Sikoa in the Gorilla position that Roman Reigns signed off on leaving CM Punk alone before he left, because Punk means something to the Wiseman. Sikoa is breaking commandments and all that.
Solo stopped him short and outright said it.
“I hate to be the one to tell you this but Roman? He’s not coming back.”
Heyman quite literally had tears in his eyes.
The ensuing match was hardly a match at all. It very quickly went to a DQ when Tama and Tonga showed up to attack Rhodes, bringing out Orton and Owens. Rhodes, it seemed, didn’t have much of a plan after all.
Sikoa sure did, though.
Indeed, while cowering away from the three top babyfaces on the blue brand, he Solo suddenly stopped and started laughing. He did so because none other than Jacob Fatu was there to launch a sneak attack of his own. He’s finally arrived in WWE and he is indeed the newest member of The Bloodline.
Solo’s Bloodline.
Everything has changed, and nothing will be the same again.
All the rest
- Chelsea Green won a Money in the Bank qualifying match by stealing the pinfall from Bianca Belair after she hit the Kiss of Death on Michin. The crowd helped make this match but these three women worked their asses off to have a really entertaining TV match that earned some well deserved “this is awesome” chants at the Allstate Arena. Green, in particular, was super over and they couldn’t have made a better choice to put her over on this particular show in front of a crowd who was incredibly pleased with it. She felt like a legitimate star here.
- The second Money in the Bank qualifying match of the night also ended in a surprise, as Carmelo Hayes defeated Randy Orton and Tama Tonga thanks to a distraction from Tonga Loa. It wasn’t intended to benefit Hayes but he was in the right place at the right time. Orton even seemed to tip his cap to it. Hey, you gotta respect an opportunist, right? Either way, Hayes probably belongs in the ladder match more than the other two.
- LA Knight called out Logan Paul for a confrontation but when he refused to answer, it was Santos Escobar who was left to hit the scene to help sell next week’s triple threat Money in the Bank qualifier. Knight disposed of him without much issue but, wouldn’t you know it, Paul actually was in the building and launched a sneak attack, ending things with the big right hand. He left LA laid out, screaming over him. Paul sold this thing so well, I cannot wait for these two to finally get some proper time to build this thing out. They’ve been relegated to secondary segments, and this showed they need more time to really beef this thing up. We’ll all be better off for it.
- The final Money in the Bank qualifier of the evening was yet another fun match that featured Andrade looking arguably as good as he has since his return en route to pinning Grayson Waller to advance. Kevin Owens was protected here, as he was taken down by The Bloodline as he was walking out and worked the match selling a leg injury. It makes all the sense in the world to do it this way and it didn’t hurt Andrade one bit, as he was over like rover in Chicago and looks poised to finally start some kind of run going forward.
They hit a home run with this one. All the matches were good, no wasted segments, the crowd was hot, a bunch of great angles, surprises, and a huge debut. What more can you ask for from a pro wrestling show?
Grade: A+
Your turn.