Phillip Schofield has said he put arrangements in place to die by suicide following his affair scandal.
The former presenter, 62, is set to open up about the emotional impact of the controversy in a three-part Channel 5 series, titled Cast Away, which sees him trying to survive on an island in the Indian Ocean for 10 days.
Schofield admits during the programme that the only reason he’s still alive is because his daughter Molly, 31, talked him down from “the edge”.
He explains his daughter, who was caring for him at the time, had asked him: “‘Can you imagine what it would do to me if you did this on my watch?’
“That was just enough to take a step back from the edge,” he explains. “And I could have been hospitalised… But then I thought, ‘That is going to get out.’ So I just raced to the family home and shut the gates.”
Retelling the story during the first Cast Away episode, the disgraced This Morning star breaks down in tears. “I never in a million years thought I’d do this,” he says of being exiled to an island for 10 days for television.
He adds: “It’s nice to discover new things about yourself… for you personally, when you don’t look online and people tell you what they think you’re like.”
Of his decision to return to public life to film the programme, the presenter explains: “I locked myself away from the outside world. But now I want to see if the ultimate isolation can finally set me free.”
Schofield left ITV last May after he admitted he had lied about having a “consensual on-off relationship” with a younger man, which took place while Schofield was still married to his wife Stephanie Lowe.
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The presenter said he arranged for the teenager to get work experience with ITV when he was around 19. He denied having any form of sexual contact with him until he was around 20 years old, after the man had been working on the show for a few months, and insisted the relationship was “consensual and fully legal”.
After the scandal emerged, Schofield apologised for lying to the media, his friends and his colleagues about the affair and immediately left ITV.
Viewers have been left incensed at the news of the former presenter’s TV comeback and have called the move a “disgrace”.
One person said the presenter was “desperate for attention” while dozens joked about the concept of the show, which sees Schofield stranded alone, as one commented” “Absolutely nobody wants to work with him so he’s doing a show that has no cast or crew.”
Schofield addresses the hostility towards him during the first Cast Away episode, saying: “I think there’d be an awful lot of people [who] hope that I never come back. Goodbye. Thank you. ‘What happened? He got washed out to sea. Well, there we go.’”
Cast Away airs over three nights beginning 30 September.
If you are experiencing feelings of distress, or are struggling to cope, you can speak to the Samaritans, in confidence, on 116 123 (UK and ROI), email jo@samaritans.org, or visit the Samaritans website to find details of your nearest branch.
If you are based in the USA, and you or someone you know needs mental health assistance right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline on 1-800-273-TALK (8255). This is a free, confidential crisis hotline that is available to everyone 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
If you are in another country, you can go to www.befrienders.org to find a helpline near you.