Sometimes you need other people to see the things you’re not seeing. For three years, I’d been avoiding looking in the mirror, only seeing my reflection when I was doing my make-up or hair. Once I started to lose weight my mum too revealed that she had been really worried about me.
I’d never been able to keep the weight off when I dieted before so I knew I had to do something more. I enlisted the help of a personal trainer at Ultimate Performance. When I first stepped into the gym I felt like such an outsider. In my head I was so much older and bigger than everyone else. I wondered why anyone was there at all because they seemed to be much further into their weight-loss journey.
They measured my body fat with callipers. It was a stark reality check when they revealed my body fat was more than 34 per cent. Then, when they took the photos of me in my underwear, I felt like giving up on the spot. Seeing those images was like a slap across the face. I’m a fairly confident person but I’ve never liked having my photo taken. Even now, close to 5 stone lighter, I still don’t.
Although I was comfortable having a male trainer, imagine the discomfort of standing in front of a 25-year-old-man, being nearly 60 years old yourself and about 5 stone overweight in your underwear.
Looking back, those photos were so helpful. Progress pictures taken every other week allowed me to see beyond the numbers on the scale, capturing subtle transformations. On tough days, I turn to them as a reminder of how far I’ve come and a vow to never return to where I was when I started. It’s not just the weight that’s changed; it’s everything – my skin tone, my circulation.