Sunday, December 22, 2024

Can’t Knock The Hustle: WWE SummerSlam 2024 Review

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SummerSlam is one of the biggest events in all of wrestling, and the 2024 edition is finally upon us.

This is quite the interesting card. We have seven matches coming to us, and all of them are singles bouts. The last time WWE presented a pay-per-view that featured nothing but singles matches was NXT Takeover 36, way back on August 22nd, 2021. You have to go back a couple more months if you want the last main roster show that featured nothing but singles matches… Hell In A Cell, on June 20th of that year.

This should be an incredibly newsworthy show, based on what we have and what we’re potentially expecting to have, so let’s get things rocking and rolling.

 

Liv Morgan vs Rhea Ripley – Women’s World Title Match

Okay, I lied. We’re actually getting the show started with a musical performance from country music star, Jelly Roll. He performed “God Bless America,” then Paul Levesque himself came out to… announce a Jelly Roll encore, leading to the singer performing his new song, “Liar.” The second performance was smartly put together by WWE. During the song, we got a bunch of wrestling footage spliced in, essentially turning it into the usual start-of-the-show video hype package.

Okay, NOW it’s time for Liv vs Rhea.

Sort of. We spent the first minute or two of the match seeing Liv ducking Rhea in every possible fashion.

After finally being caught, Liv was physically dominated for a few minutes before getting an opportunity to send Rhea, shoulder-first, into the corner. Immediately, Rhea began screaming, saying that her shoulder was out of socket. To her credit, she certainly made it look like it was. One of the bones in her shoulder is protruding a bit.

The challenger rammed her own shoulder into the announce table, getting her arm back into place. Holy moly. That was quite the visual.

After it came out again, Rhea then rammed her shoulder into the turnbuckle a handful of times to set it again. This woman is coming across as the badassiest of all badasses.

Well… we got the expected “turn” from Dominik. Dom takes a steel chair from Rhea, telling her that she can’t win the title if she’s disqualified, but then he slides the chair to Liv and distracts the referee. Next thing you know, Liv hits Rhea with ObLIVion, and she retains the title. After the match, Dom lays a huge kiss on Liv, and they leave together.

It’s difficult to rate this one. It was more of a vehicle to advance a story than an actual match. We spent a few minutes with Liv just running away from Rhea, then we spent a few more minutes with Rhea being “injured” and only having one arm to work with. If you’re looking for a great in-ring performance, this wasn’t for you. It did a good job of advancing the story, during and after the match, but I can’t go any higher than 2.5 Stars. That’s not a knock on either woman, of course. It wasn’t a “great” match, but it was never designed to be. When they square off again in a Dominik On A Pole Match, perhaps that will be their chance to shine.

 

Sami Zayn vs Bron Breakker – Intercontinental Title Match

After that first match, you know what this match needed? A shoulder injury storyline. Mere moments into the match, Bron hits his shoulder on the ring post, and he’s selling it like he’s hurt.

This… was not a long match. I didn’t even have time to really look at my keyboard for anything. They packed a lot into the time they were given, but that time was barely five minutes. Two Spears like only Bron can deliver, and we have a brand new Intercontinental Champion. Not a squash match, but definitely a showcase moment for Bron.

I don’t know how to rate this one, either. It was a better match than the previous one, but I’m not sure we got enough for me to let it approach “good” territory. Again, it was less of a match and more of a vehicle to give Bron a huge moment one of the biggest stages in the sport. 2.75 Stars, I guess?

 

Logan Paul vs LA Knight – United States Title Match

Logan hasn’t exactly had himself a great week, and he’s made it even worse by having MGK accompany him to the ring. Kevin Owens, you’re needed in aisle one.

They spent a few minutes fighting at ringside, including Knight hitting the champion with a neckbreaker through the announce table, before the match officially began.

“Fuck you, Logan” chants. In his hometown. It’s a beautiful thing.

Knight with a stiff-looking punch to Logan’s face, and then we see a mouse forming under Logan’s eye. Again, it’s a beautiful thing.

Good Lord. Knight just delivered a top rope superplex, but Logan rotated differently, landing in a half-brainbuster, half-muscle buster position. That was almost really bad for the champion.

Of course, MGK hands Logan a pair of brass knuckles. I’m so sick of this shit already. He uses the knucks, but they don’t do anything… and we have a new champion. It was pretty clear that Logan’s feet were under the bottom rope during the pin, though, so we might have to deal with this shit even longer. Kudos to the new champion, either way. It has been a long journey for him.

3 Stars. Match Of The Night so far, although by default more than anything else.

 

Bayley vs Nia Jax – WWE Women’s Title Match

Well, let’s see if an Nia Jax match changes the streak of in-ring quality tonight. Yes, I just typed that.

As this match gets underway, I have to point out that this crowd hasn’t been all that great. Some will say it’s because it isn’t a non-American crowd. Others will say it’s because the show is in an open-air stadium, so much of the crowd noise just floats into the ether. Some will say it’s because they haven’t been given a ton to be super excited about yet, and are saving themselves for the rest of the card. No matter what it is, there’s supposed to be 56,000+ in attendance, but it doesn’t sound like there’s anywhere near that number.

The mat is starting to look like a UFC event. Not only do we have the Prime logo in the middle that we’ve had for a while, but we also have Wingstop and Straight Talk Wireless logos in the corners. To go with a Manscaped “ad” earlier involving Baron Corbin, Apollo Crews, Otis, Akira Tozawa, and Maxxine Dupri… well, it’s easy to see how the company is making so much money. Everything is an advertisement for something.

Bayley woke the crowd up momentarily by performing a superhuman feat of strength. Nia went for her finisher, but Bayley got up and attacked her, then carrying Nia on her shoulders for multiple steps before slamming her to the mat. That was incredibly impressive.

Tiffany Stratton runs out with a referee, and it looks like she’s going to cash her Money In The Bank shot in, but it seems like it was more of a distraction. It works, and Bayley is destroyed by multiple powerbombs, followed by back-to-back Annihilators… one, two, three… we have a new champion.

You know what? Nia Jax has now been involved in the Match Of The Night so far tonight. 3.5 Stars. A little while back, we saw reports that WWE officials were happy with Nia’s improved ring work and that they were going to reward her for it. Looks like that was correct.

 

CM Punk vs Drew McIntyre – Seth Rollins is the Special Guest Referee

Say whatever you want about CM Punk, both as a wrestler and as a person, but one thing you can’t deny is his connection with crowds all over the world. He got the loudest reaction of the night for his entrance, and the crowd is delivering on loud “CM Punk” chants before the match gets underway.

Even two minutes deep, you can tell this is going to be a super physical match. They’re beating the hell out of each other, and they seem like they’re enjoying the ability to do so.

Rollins is letting them get away with a lot. He didn’t even start to count when they were fighting at ringside, and was then too busy tying his shoes to deal with rule breaking.

I wouldn’t quite say we’ve approached “squash” territory, but McIntyre has been dominating much of the action so far. Whenever Punk gets any offense in, McIntyre takes the momentum back right away.

Now that it has gotten dark in Cleveland, you can see a bunch of little bugs flying around the ring and ringside area. I can’t tell what kind of bugs they are, but they’re there nonetheless.

Lots of drama here. Punk locks Drew in the Anaconda Vice, only to break it up so that he can take back the bracelet that Drew stole from him. Then, minutes later, Punk goes to try a GTS, only to be distracted when he sees the bracelet on Seth’s wrist. Rollins picked it up to clear the mat of debris, like all refs do, but Punk is really focusing on that bracelet.

GTS to Rollins! Punk lays Rollins out, takes the bracelet back, but then gets kicked in the little Phils before eating a Claymore. Rollins recovers just in time to count the three for Drew, giving McIntyre the big win.

I dig the story there. The entire feud has been revolving around Drew getting distracted and letting his emotions getting the better of him. Punk lost this match specifically because he was distracted and let his emotions get the better of him. Drew with the low blow was even a reversal of what we’ve seen Punk do in the past.

Good stuff here. It didn’t reach “great” levels, but the feud clearly isn’t over yet. We can still see something between Punk and McIntyre in the future. Bad Blood has returned as an event, and it’s best known for the Hell In A Cell between The Undertaker and Shawn Michaels. How about Punk and Drew having a Hell In A Cell two months from now? I’m just saying.

3.75 Stars. Hey, a new Match Of The Night!

 

Damian Priest vs Gunther – World Heavyweight Title Match

At the sound of the opening bell, Priest hits Gunther with a forearm shot to the mush that sounded like a gunshot. Whoa.

It’s still early, but to this point, Priest has out-physicaled Gunther. He has been throwing strikes with some seriously violent intent.

Gunther’s chest is bleeding, with multiple streams of blood rolling down. Priest’s chest is battered and bruised, too. This has been crazy to watch.

Finn Bálor has arrived at ringside. Shenaniganery to come?

These guys are beating the ever-loving fuck out of each other.

Yes, shenaniganery has happened. Priest hits Gunther with South Of Heaven, but Balor puts Gunther’s foot on the bottom rope behind the referee’s back. As Priest attempts to go after Balor, Gunther locks him in a sleeper.

We have a new World Champion! Priest was able to get out of the first sleeper, but his emotions got the best of him. Instead of capitalizing, he went after Balor, allowing Gunther to get him, drop him with a powerbomb, and then put him to sleep.

RIP to The Judgment Day, first with Dominik Mysterio turning on Rhea Ripley, and now, with Finn turning on Damian Priest.

This was a blast to watch, though. 4.25 Stars. I might be underselling that a bit, as a matter of fact. You know that Gunther is bringing a level of physicality that is damn near unheard of, and that means his opponents have to rise to his level. Priest not only did just that, but he was the more physical and aggressive of the two men here.

 

Cody Rhodes vs Solo Sikoa – Bloodline Rules Match for the Undisputed WWE Title

Cody’s entrance saw him walking out from his tour bus, and as he and his dog, Pharaoh, make their way to the Gorilla Position, he is met by Arn Anderson, who gets a big pop from the crowd. Arn gives Cody a pep talk, and he sends the champion on his way. That was cool to see.

“Fuck you, Solo” chants before the match gets underway. The Cleveland crowd is ready.

LOUD “We want Roman” chants. They’re going to have to hurry up and build a roof on Cleveland Browns Stadium just so Roman Reigns’ possible return tonight can blow it right off.

The story of the early part of the match is Solo doing his homework. He has blocked and avoided multiple patented Cody spots, looking like a genius in the process.

Solo had been out there all by himself, but now, Tama Tonga and Tonga Loa have made their way to the ring and are attacking Cody. It’s Bloodline Rules, so it’s all perfectly legal.

Kevin Owens is back! He runs to the ring and is fighting off Tama and Tonga, but the numbers are still in the favor of The Bloodline… until we hear Randy Orton’s music, signaling the return of The Viper! The numbers advantage for The Bloodline is gone. The four men who aren’t officially in the match brawl their way into the crowd, leaving us back to a one-on-one match in the ring.

Jacob Fatu is here, distracting Cody, who was attempting a second Cross Rhodes. So far, the match has been going exactly the way everyone expected it to, and that’s not a complaint.

Fatu puts Cody through the announce table with a big splash from the top rope, but he appears to have injured his knee as it made contact with the table. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I hope he’s just selling, but he wasn’t able to stand up, and he has been sitting at ringside for multiple minutes.

Roman Reigns is here! Solo Sikoa looks like he has seen a ghost! Superman Punch to Solo Sikoa, and the crowd goes ballistic! “Holy shit” chants as Roman and Cody have a staredown. Roman leaves the ring, and Cody picks up the win.

As far as I know, Jacob Fatu still hasn’t gotten up from his spot at ringside.

The match was good. It wasn’t spectacular like the Bloodline Rules match we got at WrestleMania a few months ago, but that’s fine. 3.5 Stars. Solo Sikoa is in trouble, and even more so if Jacob Fatu really is hurt. That could really put a wrench in any plans for a Bloodline Civil War at Survivor Series, so it will be important to keep an eye on that.

 

It wasn’t always the best of shows with the in-ring product, but it was damn sure newsworthy from start to finish. I’ll take it. Exciting stuff.

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