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Meet Ben Affleck’s first love, Cheyenne Rothman, who he met at ‘skinny-dipping camp’ and dated longer than either of his romances with JLo – before she dumped him for a life away from spotlight

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She was the fresh-faced high school volleyball star who dated Ben Affleck for seven years before dumping him after finding his rocketing fame increasingly hard to handle.

But while Affleck, 51, is at the center of rumors that his two-year marriage to superstar singer Jennifer Lopez is all but over, DailyMail.com can reveal that life for ex-girlfriend Cheyenne Rothman couldn’t be more different.

Now a happily married mother of three, Rothman, 52, dated the actor between 1990 and 1997 – longer than either of his romances with Lopez, also 52 – but turned her back on him and the Hollywood drama in favor of a quiet life in Alameda, California.

Exclusive DailyMail.com photos show how her life now revolves around her family: her software engineer husband Lauren Haven, 50, and their three teenage sons.

Rothman, who has not been photographed since a high-profile red carpet appearance alongside Affleck at the March 1997 premiere of Chasing Amy, now spends her days running errands in the Bay Area city and walking her dog.

Ben Affleck and then girlfriend Cheyenne Rothman were seen walking the red carpet together at the March 1997 premiere of Chasing Amy. The two began dating in 1990 but split shortly after their high-profile appearance 

DailyMail.com can reveal Cheyenne, 52, is now living the quiet peaceful life her Hollywood star ex has always craved, in Alameda, California. She is pictured walking her dog in her neighborhood last weekend

DailyMail.com can reveal Cheyenne, 52, is now living the quiet peaceful life her Hollywood star ex has always craved, in Alameda, California. She is pictured walking her dog in her neighborhood last weekend 

Intensely private, her social media profiles are either locked or without pictures of her, although she is happy to make her progressive political views clear – writing about her admiration of Vermont senator Bernie Sanders on her Facebook page.

It is a far cry from Affleck and Lopez’s high-octane existence – one that he appears increasingly unhappy with, leading to him being dubbed ‘the most miserable man in Hollywood‘.

A source close to the former couple told DailyMail.com: ‘She is the one who got away but she’d had enough of Hollywood and everything that went with his fame.

‘This is just speculation but perhaps he wouldn’t be so unhappy if they’d stayed together. She was always really sweet and catnip to boys but it just got too much for her.

‘He did try to get her back after they split up [in summer 1997] but she didn’t want that lifestyle.’

The pretty brunette met Affleck in 1990 when both attended ‘Commie’ Camp Thoreau in Vermont – a now defunct summer camp known for skinny dipping and socialist politics.

Despite attending different Boston-area high schools – Brookline for Rothman and Cambridge Rindge and Latin for Affleck – the pair hit it off, with a source telling DailyMail.com Rothman was ‘sweet and down to earth’.

The insider, who attended Camp Thoreau with Affleck and Rothman said: ‘She was a girl’s girl. I really, really liked her.

Rothman, who has not been photographed since their high-profile red carpet appearance, now spends her days running errands in the Bay Area city and walking her dog

Rothman, who has not been photographed since their high-profile red carpet appearance, now spends her days running errands in the Bay Area city and walking her dog

‘She was never dramatically super model gorgeous. She’s not flashy. But she just had a way about her that was irresistible.’

Affleck, meanwhile, was the life and soul of the camp – frequently dropping down outside his bunk and doing push-ups to impress the girls.

An athlete himself, he was the star of Cambridge Rindge and Latin’s indoor track team with a 1990 yearbook photo showing him posing with his teammates and Coach Maguire.

Affleck also excelled at cross country running with his team becoming the Suburban League Champions and the Massachusetts State runners-up the same year.

Sporty though he was, Affleck and classmate Matt Damon were also known for their acting – with Affleck’s stint on PBS show Voyage of the Mimi turning him into a smalltown celebrity.

The source said: ‘He was funny but he did like to tell people he was on TV. Matt was more low key.’

Like Affleck, Rothman was also known for her sporting prowess – and was dubbed ‘our back court weapon’ by her volleyball teammates in the 1989 edition of Brookline High School’s Murivian yearbook.

After graduating high school, Rothman attended private liberal arts college Colby in Waterville, Maine, while Affleck plumped for the University of Vermont,  a five-hour drive away.

Rothman briefly harbored Hollywood dreams of her own, working as a short film director after her split from Affleck. She is pictured at the premiere of her movie Release the Kraken in 2004

Rothman briefly harbored Hollywood dreams of her own, working as a short film director after her split from Affleck. She is pictured at the premiere of her movie Release the Kraken in 2004 

Affleck moved on from Rothman by dating Gwyneth Paltrow who he went on to co-star with in the movies Shakespeare in Love and Bounce

Affleck moved on from Rothman by dating Gwyneth Paltrow who he went on to co-star with in the movies Shakespeare in Love and Bounce

.Affleck married Jennifer Garber in 2005

If Affleck and wife Jennifer Lopez are indeed on the brink of a divorce as rumored, it'd mean his seven-year relationship lasted longer than both of his relationships with the superstar singer

Affleck married Jennifer Garner in 2005. The couple had three children before splitting in 2018. He then reunited with JLo and married her in 2022

Although Affleck washed out of his Spanish degree after a few months and relocated to LA, the pair continued to date for several years with Rothman also moving to California after completing her degree in 1994.

But as Affleck’s fame skyrocketed, the relationship soured – coming to a juddering halt in summer 1997 with the actor moving on to Gwyneth Paltrow.

While Rothman briefly harbored Hollywood dreams of her own – directing and producing a 10-minute comedy short called Release the Kraken in 2004 – her career took a more eclectic twist.

In a blog post published in 2008, Rothman describes spending her twenties moving up and down the west coast, becoming a teacher in LA, a lumberjack in Tacoma, Washington, and a residential treatment worker.

She also held down jobs as a residential social worker and as a writer in LA before meeting and marrying Haven and settling down to life as a full-time mother.

Approached by DailyMail.com and asked whether she would like to share some memories of her time with Affleck, Rothman declined to comment.

But as Affleck’s marriage to Lopez buckles under the weight of their combined fame and his well-documented substance abuse battles, it appears low-profile, low-key Rothman made the right choice after all.

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